OM NOM NOM (Foods post, part 2)

As I sit here enjoying my mother's frosted sugar cookies, I'm reminded of how lucky I am to be able to be sitting here... eating my mother's frosted sugar cookies. To most people, eating simple foods is just second nature. It's a part of life. Hungry? Grab whatever's available. It's not so easy for a Crohnie to just grab-and-go, unfortunately. We have to analyze, consider the risks, and bargain with ourselves over every single bite we take.

As promised, I am posting a list of foods that I, personally, can enjoy with my Crohn's, usually without any problems. (For part 1 of this topic, click HERE) But, I want to make it clear that every Crohn's/UC patient is different - what one of us can eat could send another of us to the hospital. So, this list is purely from my own perspective, and maybe it will help other Crohnies discover some things to try.

YAY FOODS!:

• Pasta - regular pasta is best for me. The whole-grain type gives me far too many problems. Anything from spaghetti to macaroni to bow-ties. YUM! I have to make sure it's fully cooked and soft (al dente is too hard to digest), and I really love it with just some butter and cheese, or even Alfredo sauce. Red meat sauces are iffy... I try to avoid any meat in them, unless it's meat I've added myself. Plus, the abundance of the tomato acids in the red sauces tends to produce severe acid reflux, so I can only have small amounts of red sauces. I recently started mixing red and white sauces, and it's delicious! 
• Filled pastas, such as ravioli, tortellini, or stuffed shells - If they're filled with mostly cheese, I'm good to go! The ones that are filled with sausage or other meats tend to cause some discomfort, but I still allow myself to enjoy it from time to time. That's the "bargaining" part of our diet... you know it might make you slightly ill, but the indulging might be worth it!
• Seafood - I really love all sorts of fish, shellfish, and even the occasional clam strips. There are a few things I have to remember with these delights: watch for bones!! These can cause harm to anyone, not just Crohnies! And if it's cooked with too much butter or grease, I'm going to be in some major discomfort. Again, I do bargain with myself on seafood, because I LOVE IT. 
• Cooked Veggies - Raw veggies typically send me to the floor in the fetal position within a few minutes after eating them. I now avoid them completely. But COOKED veggies are much easier on the digestive system, and I can enjoy quite a few of them. Some of my favorites are green beans, beets, mushrooms, artichokes, squash (such as acorn squash or spaghetti squash), zucchini, summer squash (the yellow kind that looks like zucchini), and cooked/steamed cauliflower.
• Potatoes - I didn't include this in the "veggies" above, because I think it deserves to be in it's own category. I LOVE potatoes. It doesn't matter how they're prepared. Mashed, baked, sliced, diced, chips, fries, tater tots, boiled... I'll eat them! I garnish my baked potatoes with cheese, butter, or sour cream (or all of the above, if I'm feeling adventurous). I like fries and tots dipped in ketchup, ranch dressing, or even mayonnaise. I loved oven-baked diced potatoes, as long as the spices used aren't too hot or whole. Heck, I will even peel a small potato and eat it like an apple, on occasion! They're so delicious, and they're filling, so for me, it serves as a meal in itself.
• Bread - I choose non-enriched white bread for my diet. Not considered "healthy" by most standards, but whole-grain bread and enriched breads make me very sick. The bakeries at most grocery stores sell Italian or French breads that are perfect for me. They freeze nicely too, so I can stock up. I enjoy making toast, with various items on top: butter/margarine, jam (NOT preserves!), peanut butter, and sometimes even mayonnaise. Don't judge.
• Condiments - I can enjoy small amounts of many types of accessory foods: real butter or margarine (vegetable spreads); smooth peanut butter, including almond and cashew butter - as long as there are no chunks of nuts; jams and jellies without whole pieces of fruit (no preserves or marmalade); salad dressings of all sorts; mayonnaise (I prefer the type made from olive oil rather than eggs); ketchup; A-1 steak sauce; barbecue/BBQ sauce; Alfredo sauce; marinara sauce without meat; sour cream and sour cream-based dips; wine sauces; Hollandaise sauce; maple syrup; yellow (non-spicy) mustard; cream cheese spread. I'm sure there are others that I can't think of off the top of my head at the moment, and I'll revise the post as I think of them.
• Fruits - Probably the most difficult part of my diet is trying to integrate fruits. They hate my guts! I can eat bananas, pears, and small oranges without any problems. That's about it. However, I haven't given up on trying all kinds of fruits! They are all so tasty and delicious, so sometimes I'll "test" them out to see how my body responds. Unfortunately, it's usually a very negative response, and I wind up in bed or on the toilet all day long. *sad face*
• Processed Foods - Fortunately for me, I live in America, where the processed food industry output is abundant and inexpensive. Also, highly controversial. Processed foods typically involve the use of many chemicals not meant for human consumption. BUT... my body seems to be OK with this. In fact, my guts seem to prefer a factory-made, preservative-loaded chocolate cupcake over a homemade one. I've given up on trying to understand it, and I just roll with it. I still eat these kinds of foods in moderation, but sometimes, it's all I can stomach. Especially instant oatmeal. YUM! Or Little Debbie Zebra Cakes. OMG. YUM. Oreo Cookies? TO DIE FOR. Doritos? A must-have. Kraft Macaroni & Cheese? My life support. Banquet oven-ready Pot Pies for 89 cents? I'll eat them daily! Ramen noodles = my go-to meal. It is not without guilt that I enjoy these foods, but they truly are my comfort foods - they do not cause my Crohn's to act up whatsoever... probably because my body can't figure out what to do with all those chemicals!
• Fast Foods - I strongly dislike fast-food, but let's be honest: sometimes, you just need to grab something quick and you don't have any other options. McDonalds is a place I have a love-hate relationship with. I love their breakfast foods, namely the breakfast burrito. It's cheap, simple, and easy on my stomach. It does have small amounts of sausage and peppers in it, but they're so overly cooked and processed that my body doesn't seem to notice. Their lunch and dinner offerings are a HUGE hurdle for me. Their burgers are made with overly-processed meat, so I CAN digest them, but they are so greasy, I wind up feeling terrible for hours afterward. Their whole-piece chicken products (like the grilled chicken sandwiches) are delicious, and I usually do OK with them, as long as there are no veggies on the burger. Big NO to the fried foods, except for their French fries - I can nosh a small handful of those without any problems. 
• Rather than go through each and every fast-food restaurant menu listing, I'll just say that I try to avoid fast food as much as possible. Subway's offerings have been my best bet thus far, but even their "fresh" ingredients tend to make me ill. I'm better off making a PB&J sandwich to go before I leave the house for the day, to eat when I'm hungry.
• Soups - Soups are usually pretty good to me, as long as I choose ones that don't have difficult ingredients. I stay away from soups with lots of peppers or celery, but I certainly enjoy the potatoes, carrots, and barley. Clam chowder is one of my favorites, along with cheesy potato soup, and good ol' classic chicken noodle soup. 
• Dairy - this has been an ongoing roller-coaster for me. Depending on my current medication regimen, I can either enjoy all the dairy I want, or I can't have a drop of it. When i'm on steroid medication for my Crohn's, I become so intolerant of dairy, that it literally comes right back up and out my mouth. But, when I'm not on that type of medication, I can indulge in all things dairy and it's wonderful! I do TRY to indulge in moderation, but lets face it - ice cream, cheese, milk, yogurt - it's all so delicious! I tend to go a little overboard at times, thus making myself sick. But I believe that could happen to anyone who over-indulges in any kind of food. 

I hope my list above will offer some insight into the diet of a Crohnie. Again, this list is NOT going to be the same for every Crohnie. Some patients find that dairy, gluten, or preservatives are their worst enemies. Some can only eat liquid forms of everything. And some even resort to eating ONE type of food every day for the rest of their lives, to avoid getting sick. 

I recommend Crohn's and UC sufferers warriors learn by process of elimination what foods work best for you. And then, in a year or two, try again. I have discovered that I can eat some foods now that I couldn't eat previously. I believe our bodies and our symptoms are ever-changing, and it is to our benefit to change with them. 

A great source for elimination diet tips and how-to's can be found at  http://www.precisionnutrition.com/elimination-diet.

What are some of your go-to foods? What about your big no-no foods? Comment below!

Prepping for Humility

It's a little strange to think that I was supposed to spend today on a clear-liquid diet, followed by colon cleansing preparation for surgery. Now that surgery has been postponed, this gave me an idea of something helpful I can post about - preparing for colonoscopy / sigmoidoscopy / intestinal surgery.

If you've ever had a colonoscopy, you will probably nod in agreement that the worst part of the whole process is the preparation. The procedure itself happens while you are under anesthesia, so you wont feel or remember anything. But the day before the procedure, I'm not going to lie...

IT. IS. HELL.

I'll give you my personal experiences (I've had 3 colonoscopies, 1 sigmoidoscopy, and a few upper endoscopies just for fun), and the preparations for each all produce the same results, just with different preparation mixtures.

Step 1: I spend the week before the procedure eating and drinking only simple foods that are easy to digest and won't upset my guts. This supposedly ensures the prep will be easier. I say "supposedly," because I don't really think any type of "diet" will make the prep more bearable.

Step 2: The day before the procedure (or starting 24 hours before), I am restricted to a clear-liquids only diet. That means if you can't see through it, you can't drink it. And absolutely NO FOOD. Some of the recommended drinkables are:
Water (duh)
Clear soda
Broth - chicken, beef, or vegetable
Apple juice
Fruit-flavored beverages (Kool-Aid, Crystal Light, etc.)
Jell-O
Popsicles
Hard candy
Coffee (YAY!) or tea, WITHOUT cream (sugar is OK)

This diet has been known to cause mental insanity in those who love food**. I recommend keeping to yourself for the entire day, because things are only going to get worse. That's not intended to scare you, I'm just being honest!

(**I made that up.)

Step 3: At a particular time of the afternoon or evening that the doctor has already determined, chemical prep begins. I have used three different types of colon prep, all of which provided the same results.
 

Golytely: This is a 1-gallon bottle you get by prescription only. This is probably the oldest, most-common colon prep solution available. I even recall my grandmother using this when I was but a wee girl. When you get the bottle, it's mostly empty with some powdered junk inside. You fill the gallon jug with lukewarm water (yes, lukewarm - not cold, not even room temp. LUKEWARM). Once the mixture is completely dissolved, you drink it. Sounds easy enough, right? Let me see if I can explain what it's like, using my education and wordsmithing ability:

It's really yucky.

You have to drink this entire gallon of piss-warm, synthetic-salt-water tasting liquid. And yes, one size fits all, apparently. Whether you're a 400lb person or a 90lb person, you have to drink ALL of it. And, to make things worse, you have to drink all of it WITHIN 2 HOURS.

After the first glass or two, I started hearing the sounds of beached whales in heat coming from deep within my guts. After the third glass, I felt my bowels literally moving.

A little piece of advice while doing colon prep: don't trust that fart. In fact, don't trust that cough, sneeze, or giggle either. Just get to a toilet ASAP.

As you can imagine, the remainder of the 2-hour chug-fest was spent mostly on the toilet, with occasional breaks to drink more Golytely. I tried sucking on hard candies before taking a swig to mask the horrific taste, but chemicals are stronger than sugar, and there is no hiding that flavor.

I had almost finished the jug within the 2-hour window, and my body had completely turned against me. I was now gagging at every sip, I was extremely bloated and feeling feverish - all while continuing to visit the royal bathroom throne endlessly. I couldn't bring myself to finish the last 8 ounces or so, and I convinced myself this was okay. I believed there was no possible way for my body to handle any additional internal cleansing.

Turns out, it was okay. In fact, my doctor told me the next day that they don't actually expect everyone to drink the whole jug. They prescribe it that way, though, so you will drink as much as you can force. Those bastards!

Fleet Phosph-Soda: Don't be confused by the word "soda" or by the "ginger-lemon flavor" description. There is nothing resembling gingerale in this package. NOTHING. This stuff is just a concentrated version of the Golytely jug, and ultimately, you're going to drink the same amount of liquid.

This 3 ounce bottle packs a punch. And they give you TWO of them. 6 ounces seemed like such a relief from that giant gallon jug, until I read the instructions. I had to mix these bottles with approximately ONE GALLON of water.

The only bright side here is that the water could be as cold as you desire. Since this stuff is already in liquid form, it mixes nicely at any temperature.

It tasted the same as the Golytely, except it had a slight pharmaceutical sweetness to it. That made it taste even worse, in my opinion. It was a little easier to chug ice-cold liquid, however, and that did make the prep about 0.0001% easier than the Golytely prep.

The process was about the same - over a 2 hour period, you had to finish both bottles with the respective amounts of mixed-in water. Only, this time I actually prepared myself to spend the entire evening in the bathroom, by having reading material, a blanket, and even a pillow to place behind my back. I highly recommend these items, as well as your phone, tablet, or a laptop, so that you can communicate to the world the exact torture you're experiencing.

Suprep Kit: Finally, someone in the pharmaceutical industry must have had a colonoscopy and realized how appalling and disgusting the prep is. Because this product, Suprep, was a saving grace!

This kit comes with everything you see above, including the cup. The bottles of liquid are just 6-ounces each. This type of prep is a two-step process: you do half of the prep the night before, and the other half the morning of your colonoscopy.

My experience with this product was mostly better than the previous preps. In this kit, you drink one of the bottles of liquid STRAIGHT. It's not necessary to mix it with anything. It doesn't taste great, but it doesn't taste as horrible as the Golytely or Fleet preps. After you drink the bottle, you drink several cups full of plain water. Using the provided cup, you don't have to guess at how much you're drinking, because the instructions tell you how many of their cups of water to drink.

The whole thing took about an hour, although I don't recall there being a specific time limit to this one. It took a little longer for it to work its "magic," but soon enough, I was a fixture in the loo, as expected. I still experienced the stomach bloating and feverishness, but I knew to expect that.

The next morning, I had to take the second dose. For some reason, my body decided "nope, we're done here," and I puked up the bottle of liquid almost immediately. I was still able to drink the necessary cups of water, and I was pretty darn sure there was nothing left in my bowels to be cleaned out after the night before. I was right, the colonoscopy happened without any problems.


Step 4: I suppose I already touched on step 4, which is the whole bathroom experience. But for the sake of laughter, let's recap:
 - Never trust a fart, giggle, cough, sneeze, or any sudden movements, unless you are already on the toilet.
 - Have your cell phone, tablet, laptop, or Kindle fully charged up and with you in the bathroom. You can only read that shampoo bottle so many times before you start repeating it in your sleep.
 - Your ass WILL hurt, when all is said and done. Pure liquid will be escaping you at a rate you never thought possible for the next 4-8 hours following colon prep. Have some baby wipes or disposable wipes available to help stay clean and comfortable.
 - Wear comfortable clothes. And don't wear expensive ones... it goes without saying you might "mess" in your britches.
 - Try to convince yourself that this will be worth the humiliation, pain, and disgust. And go ahead and plan out a midday meal following your procedure! You'll be loopy and fuzz-brained, but it will be the best meal you've ever had!

I have not covered all of the available colon preparation types in this post, I have only talked about the ones I've personally used before. In fact, the preparation for my surgery is not any one of the three I discussed - it's a simple mixture of over-the-counter laxatives and Miralax solution with some Gatorade. Hopefully this will be more pleasant than the last time!

What was your prep experience like? Did you have a different type of prep solution? Have you ever been turned away from your 'scope appointment because you weren't cleaned out enough? Let me know in the comments or privately by using the contact box to the right.